Fear is the dream-killer. Doubt and fear, worries and obsession about what could go wrong stops creativity in its tracks. We stop thinking “wouldn’t it be awesome if I could make this happen” and forget all about addressing the fears and putting a plan in place to address them.
My mom taught me to be aware of the fatal flaws of any plan REALLY well. “What if? What if? Have you thought about that?” Well, for better or worse now as an adult, yes, I do. It serves me well in many situations (which is why the pattern is so difficult to eradicate), but what she didn’t teach me was how to ask for help to figure out ways to address problems that come up or how to follow a long-term plan for success while keeping those doubts and fears from sabotaging my confidence, patience, and will-power along the way. And she didn’t teach me how not to be ever striving. Truthfully, it’s not really good enough to be totally future-based. None of know that the future we want will actually come—we don’t know if something unexpected might happen that could disrupt everything. On some level we have to focus most on living the best way we can today and develop the capacity to know we can handle whatever comes up even if those plans don’t succeed and never can. (Read this post by Suleika Jaouad on radical acceptance.) I think that believing in our ability to go after our dreams and yet also accept things the way they are, and trust in our ability to adapt and handle things and receive the help we need, are all aspects of faith.
Recently, I’ve been writing about making changes at midlife, decision-making, and inner strength in challenging times (all worth reading if your issue is decision-making about making changes in the face of fear). I also think that patience and perseverance are essential. But on some level, I think more and more often, the most important capacity of all might just be the ability to have faith.
Let’s discuss that. I’m not talking about religious faith here (although I do think that in some cases flower essences could help with that). I’m talking about having faith that you will find your way despite the fatal flaws and obstacles that you see. It’s the faith that says “well, that’s a problem, let’s find out how to address that! ” It’s also faith to believe that it is quite possible to have a wonderful life even if our dreams for the future never come true or can’t.
What helps from a flower essence point of view? SO many things in the Bach and North American flower essence repertoire address faith! It’s almost the heart and soul of this practice—addressing the mental and emotional issues that keep a person from believing in themselves and their ability to have a good life. A person could say it’s all about regaining balance, feeling fortunate in body and mind, and, therefore, able to have a positive belief about the present day and the days to come.
There are, however, some specific flower essences that seem to address having faith when you’ve lost it. Here are a few that come to mind:
Self-Heal was the first one that popped up for me just now (even though I was intending to go elsewhere with this post). This flower essence doesn’t get enough spotlight from me even though I use it in one of my most powerful formulas Support for Troubled Times. Self-Heal is the part of that formula that helps you rally your inner forces and have more faith in yourself. It adds a deep feeling of inner wellness or a belief that you can heal your life when that sense of well-being has been rocked to the core. In particular, it can help when you just don’t think you have it in you to fight hard enough for yourself or if you think it’s going to take more than you can handle. It’s a great addition to just about any healing regimen.
My Releasing Worry and Fear formula is amazing for calming doubt and fear. It helps you regain your grounding so you can think calmly about the situation you are in and find your courage and confidence to go forward.
Renewed Faith and Optimism is a flower essence formula that combines Borage (for relieving discouragement), Impatiens (for patience and relieving irritation with the slow pace of life), Larch (for confidence and more positive expectations), and Zinnia (for optimism and light-hearted enthusiasm). It’s great if, like me, you tend to lose heart when things you’re trying to do have been taking a long time.
Gentian is for faith to try again after a setback. It helps, in particular, if the setback feels like something that will be difficult to recover from and you need to believe you can.
Gorse is for when you have lost faith in a positive future and are giving up or feel resigned to your fate. This is more intense than simply a setback, it seems like life is just one setback after another. It helps you find the willpower to fight for yourself again and reignites faith and hope.
Sweet Chestnut is for when you have hit such a low point that you’re in great despair and feel like all hope is lost. I think of this essence as the one to use when you need the BIG guns—you’re in such depths of despair because you see no way forward and fear that your current life, maybe your whole life, is being destroyed. And sometimes that may be true, sometimes you have to hit bottom to allow for the change you need. Sweet Chestnut can help you find that hope and faith and ability to see a way through to a brighter tomorrow even if destruction of your current life should happen. Sweet Chestnut is probably the greatest flower essence tool for radical acceptance (such as Suleika describes) that I know. And frequently a person finds that when they do hit that rock bottom place and accept that it’s happening, that you finally crack out of the rock hard mold of what you think your life has to be enough to let the Light of Higher Guidance or human guidance, love, and assistance in.
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Flower essences are used to assist with mind-body-spirit interactions and individual results may vary. They are extremely dilute which makes them quite safe. But because so little physical substance can be detected in a flower essence solution, these products are presumed to work on an energetic or vibrational level—something that cannot be adequately tested by western scientific methods. Claims made by me, therefore, are based on personal experiences and the evidence of the combined multiple decades of case notes by Dr. Edward Bach as well as Healing Herbs and Flower Essence Services (the companies who make the ingredients I use in my products). This is not, however, accepted medical evidence or substantiated scientific evidence from a modern allopathic point of view. I am not a medical doctor or licensed healthcare practitioner.
Statements made have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. The information provided on my blog, websites or by this company are not a substitute for a face-to-face consultation with a health care provider, and should not be construed as individual medical or mental health advice. Consulting with a health care provider is a must for anyone taking medications or working with a medical or mental health condition, and highly recommended before using any herbal product. Please consult your doctor or health care provider for any possible contraindications and/or interactions with current medications. I trust you to seek the medical guidance you need to use any of my herbal products healthily at your own risk.