Empathy is good. Compassion is better. Loving others and wanting to provide help and care is part of a healthy human experience. But how do you do that without obsessive worry that does nobody any good?
Typically this comes about when you love someone so much you don’t know how you would live without them. That’s a major parent or spouse’s dilemma. You worry and fret whenever your loved ones leave the house, embark on what should be an exciting adventure, or have what seems like a very serious problem in their life. And your legitimate desire to make sure they will be alright is unwelcome or dismissed which just makes things worse! Or you know better than to act that out too much but it’s taking over your every waking moment or keeping you awake at night.
Another common circumstance these days is worrying about someone in your social media newsfeed you otherwise don’t even know or, worse, people in the news going though some horrific experience. On the surface, it appears appropriate and right for you to care, share your concern on the internet with others, rally the troops (so to speak), and try to fight for them. It IS good. But is it taking up all the emotional space in your life, keeping you up at night, or making you neglect things in your own life? Is it sapping all your joy?
“JOY? How can I be joyful when there is so much horror happening in the world?!!”
I know, I get you. My partner Paul and I go down this road a lot. I think it is one of the pitfalls of the healer path. So today I dug out the Red Chestnut and tried some in order to calm those anxieties down. But lo and behold, it wasn’t actually straight anxiety. Grief is what popped up. The situations and people we’re worried about are not just worrisome, they’re heartbreaking! I cried a few tears and then felt more centered and strong.
I read something written by the Dalai Lama years ago where he described how a consistent meditation practice could help you sit in compassion around other people’s pain, and allow you to provide help and support without losing your ability to provide a joyful calm presence. That’s actually his claim to fame as far as I’m concerned, and also a really important gift to give someone as a healer. It helps them reconnect with their own belief in themselves to know that someone who cares is not completely freaking out.
Red Chestnut won’t keep you from caring. It won’t keep you from taking action or rallying people to help when it could make a difference. But it helps you do or not do things from a place of compassionate calm and inner strength, even peace. It soothes your heart so you can care without the obsessive anxiety.
And it can help you have a larger perspective. The horrors of life don’t need to take up your entire view. Right now, after taking Red Chestnut a couple of times today, I am enjoying the breeze while sitting on my apartment balcony and the songs of birds and cicadas in the trees nearby. I am aware of the problems I was concerned about before. I will probably take a specific action or two. But right now, it is SO great to enjoy being here in the present moment taking in the wider view.
Find Reiki-infused dosage strength Red Chestnut dropper bottles and unscented sprays in my Etsy shop.
––––––––––––––––––––––––
Flower essences are used to assist with mind-body-spirit interactions and individual results may vary. They are extremely dilute which makes them quite safe. But because so little physical substance can be detected in a flower essence solution, these products are presumed to work on an energetic or vibrational level—something that cannot be adequately tested by western scientific methods. Claims made by me, therefore, are based on personal experiences and the evidence of the combined multiple decades of case notes by Dr. Edward Bach as well as Healing Herbs and Flower Essence Services (the companies who make the ingredients I use in my products). This is not, however, accepted medical evidence or substantiated scientific evidence from a modern allopathic point of view. I am not a medical doctor or licensed healthcare practitioner.
Statements made have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. The information provided on my blog, websites or by this company are not a substitute for a face-to-face consultation with a health care provider, and should not be construed as individual medical or mental health advice. Consulting with a health care provider is a must for anyone taking medications or working with a medical or mental health condition, and highly recommended before using any herbal product. Please consult your doctor or health care provider for any possible contraindications and/or interactions with current medications. I trust you to seek the medical guidance you need to use any of my herbal products healthily at your own risk.